I just came back from Mexico from an awesome experience. I was planning on going to the Harvard-Yale football game this weekend. I was looking forward to loving on people I love so much. Alas, with me feeling sick and the plane ticket prices sky rocketing, I didn’t go. God definitely has his plans though. I was in my car on my way back from the church mission in Algodones. I wasn’t in a good mood because I had gone into the house of a woman who attends the church and saw pictures of “saints” in her house. It just makes me so sad that people have a culture that has religion and idolatry traditions so intertwined, and many people don't let go of their traditions and hold on to Jesus. I prayed, like I pray for my mom and many others, that God would make His truths evident.
So, I was in my car in a sad mood, when a man comes up to me asking for money for a drug rehabilitation center he attends. After I informed him I didn’t have any money, he asked if I took care of children (my car exterior is full of colorful hand prints). I told him that I am a teacher in the states, and come to teach kids about God in Mexico on Saturdays. I told him about Luke chapter 17, which is what was talked about today, how only one of ten men who Jesus healed of leprosy came back to thank God.
He then told me about his life, how God has been good to him, and how he was not worthy to be in God’s presence. I told him none of us is worthy on our own, but by accepting that Jesus died for our sins and accepting Him into our lives, He makes us worthy. He said he wanted to accept Jesus into his life. So right there in the line to the US with our hands held outside my car door, he prayed acknowledging that he had sinned and believed that Jesus died to pay for those sins. He asked God to take over his life. How awesome! I am looking forward to going to give him a Bible in Spanish and showing Him some of God’s word: his awesome promises and love, and all the great things he wants to do in his life. Salvation occurs in an instant, but sanctification lasts a whole lifetime. What an awesome journey! What a wonderful God!
Saturday, November 18, 2006
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Harvard Report 2: Plans for hope and a future...
I have learned a lot this year from directing the Wisdom Exchange Mentoring Program, from what the participating girls told me about their experience in the program, and from many experiences I had during a trip this summer. I have come to realize that God will protect me and use me for His wonderful purposes when I am doing what He asks, which is basically love God above all things and love your neighbor as yourself. It has also become very clear to me that this is true: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). Part of this future is modifying Wisdom Exchange.
Wisdom Exchange 2006 ended nicely. A bus full of excited girls went to the science museum in San Diego. The girls had fun and learned about physics, noise vibrations, reflections, etc. The girls also enjoyed executing their community service projects. All the girls made paintings and each group took them somewhere: a homeless shelter, battered women’s shelter, nursing home, and a rehabilitation hospital. During their visits many of the girls went up to a guest, had a short conversation and gave her/him the painting she had made. Some groups took additional things such as Easter baskets and plants.
During the last week as director of Wisdom Exchange 2006, I received a letter of vacancy from the Housing Authority of the City of Yuma. I had been told that I would more than likely be able to extend my contract to use the community center and office space, so I was disappointed to receive this letter. But as the saying goes: God closes some doors, but opens others. I approached the owner of an abandoned ice cream shop across the street from a public housing complex and told him, “I want to open a café/homework help center to show people Jesus’ love.” He called me a few days after our meeting and said, “The building is yours, rent free.” A similar blessing is that the owner of my apartment is only charging me utilities, because he said he liked the work I do. With the money saved in not having to pay rent and some money I had saved I was able to pay for a trip to Europe, similar to one I had wanted to take the year before.
At the end of Wisdom Exchange, I asked all of the participants to fill out evaluations. Mentors said they learned several skills, including being a leader, benefited from having women from the community speak with them, and were glad they had given their time and been mentors. Many of the girls in middle school grasped the skills taught very well, while several of the girls in elementary school did not seem to grasp many of skills very well or were not able to convey it in the evaluations. Because I did not require the girls to write their name on the evaluations I was not able to establish a correlation between skills grasped and attendance, something I will change in the future. All in all, the program was a success. The mission statement (to provide women and girls with opportunities to share the knowledge, experiences, and lessons learned from women in the community and throughout the world) was accomplished. For future work with children I will emphasize using proper discipline and teaching at age appropriate levels, especially regarding attention spans.
I am thankful for all that was learned by the participants and myself and especially thankful and touched by comments left by my middle school mentees, like the following: “She made me feel like I was special.” “You’d make a great mother.” This is the comment that means the most to me: “When I first met you, I thought I wouldn’t like you, but you still tried and now I can honestly say you are a true and wonderful friend. (heart, cross) God loves you. Tina” This is the young lady I mentioned in my first report, whose father had raped her; she became a Christian and stopped cutting herself, shortly after I reassured her that her father was twisted, informed her that Jesus understood how she felt because He too was abandoned by those He loved, and God her Father in heaven loved her. How wonderful that God was able to shine His love through me!
As I embarked on my trip to Europe my main goal was to share Jesus’ love and goodness, and our need for Him with others. I never could have planned what occurred during the following two months in Europe. One of the highlights of my trip occurred in Rome. I met a man named Andres. Andres told me about his children in Milan, his divorce, and his job. I told him God had great plans for his life. He said, “I’ve read the Bible.” I responded, “It is one thing to read it, another to believe it, and trust God.” I shared with Andres what I wrote about in my first report to you: how Jesus had helped me forgive and love people that I did not think I could love or forgive. I told him how following Jesus and really treating the Bible as Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth (B.I.B.L.E.), reading a portion of it everyday and taking it into context, has changed the way I see things and live. I told him the most important thing I ever did was inviting Jesus into my heart; He has truly helped me understand what life is about: loving Him and loving others. We talked from midnight until two a.m. When we parted he said, “I feel like a little boy who has just opened a new gift.” If my trip would have ended there, I would have been content.
The biggest highlight of my trip occurred while I was in London on a mission trip. Most of my days were busy: picking up trash, going door to door inviting people to a fun day for kids, visiting the elderly. However, it was on a quiet morning walk, when something truly wonderful occurred: I met Mick, a man willing to change. Mick realized that there would be judgment. We are made in God's image; we want the bad guys to get punished and the good guys to get a reward. God will punish, but only those whose sins are still upon them, whose sins have not been paid for. Mick realized he had sinned, broken at least one of The Ten Commandments; all humans have, except for Jesus: “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21). Mick believed Jesus paid for his sins on the cross, and all he needed to do was repent and believe in Him. Mick asked God to forgive him of his sins, asked God to help him turn from sin, and accepted Christ into his heart. How awesome to be used by God to bring one more soul into His kingdom!
I wish I could say something similar occurred while in Spain or while in the East Coast. All the people I met with were good: they seemed happy, had well paying jobs, nice homes, and almost all of them were in good physical health. Unfortunately, as the saying goes, what is good is often the enemy of what is best. Only Christ can give the best! We are satisfied with the “good”. Ironically, sometimes the “good” is not even that good. As I talked with many of my friends and family members, I saw sadness, unforgiveness, and bitterness. A few of them were also in physical pain. It was difficult for me to see them suffer. The emotional pain was especially hard to witness, because it could have been prevented and could be resolved with God’s help. I agree with C.S. Lewis in his book The Problem of Pain, experiencing pain can help those effected stop leaning on their understanding and come to trust God.
I experienced pain as soon as I returned home. I was telling my parents about my trip and my mom said, “You and talking to people about Jesus.” She has a negative attitude toward some of the things I believe; I think it is because both her mom and grandma were Catholic and she was raised to think differently. I tell my mom, “The most important thing is to love God above all things.” God knows our heart. He promises that if you seek Him with all your heart you will find Him (Jeremiah 29:13). I saw the reality of this promise in London; a Muslim woman had a vision of Christ and became a Christian afterwards. I drew closer to God because of my mom’s comment, praying for her more and more specifically.
A year ago, I was planning to stay in the Yuma community for a few years establishing and directing Wisdom Exchange. Now, I do not know where I will be in a year. I am currently praying about becoming an overseas missionary next fall. Regardless of what happens in the years to come, working with the girls this past year was an invaluable experience, through which God allowed me to touch lives, showed me needs to address this year, and taught me ways to address certain needs for the rest of my life.
I am grateful for all those who were involved in my receiving the Richardson Fellowship: the Richardson family, my recommendation letter writers, judges, and everyone at the Harvard College Fellowships Office. I am thankful for Lindsay Hyde, Strong Women, Strong Girls founder, for allowing me to use her program model and curriculum. I am especially thankful for Michelle Kang, my house tutor, friend, and sister in Christ; for helping me through the application process, for encouraging me, and for believing in me, even when I did not. Thank you all; the Richardson Fellowship enabled me to help girls in my community and funded the best year of my life. A special thank you to: all my mentors for your dedication, my sister for her thorough editing, the Housing Authority of the City of Yuma for the use of their space, Ariel Harms and Lindsay Hyde for helping me get started, and all the women who gave of their time. Wisdom Exchange existed because you gave.
I have decided to modify the Wisdom Exchange program to be 10th and 11th grade girls mentoring 8th grade girls with an adult woman in each group. I recognized girls in these age groups face many challenges and need all the skill training and encouragement they can get. One of the girls in one of my mentoring groups, an 8th grader, told me that her boyfriend wanted to have sex with her and that she did not know what to do. Just having the girls make a list of pros and cons about life-altering decisions, like having sex, can help them see what is at stake and prevent them from making harmful choices. There will be seminars for the mentors on the college application process, writing essays, and budgeting. Besides teach skills and provide support, this program will foster friendships that will allow the 8th graders to have the 10th and 11th graders as "big sisters" when they begin high school. I also recognized the importance of having other adult women run the groups, and interact with and get to know the participants during weekly meetings and outings. This will allow all of the participants to have several women they can trust and reach out to for years to come. God willing, this program will be implemented in six middle schools by January and continue for years to come.
I plan to continue pursuing relationships with as many of the girls who participated in Wisdom Exchange last year as possible. So far, their response has been very good. During my travels, I sent them post cards, and upon my return, when I saw them, they told me they were happy to have received them. Last week I hosted an ice cream/movie night for the mentors to catch up with me and one another; it was a blast. I have been spending quite a bit of time with many of the 3rd -5th grade girls who live in public housing in Arizona. I plan on substitute teaching three days a week starting at the end of November at the school in California that many of the other girls attend; I look forward to seeing many, hopefully all, of them participate in the Wisdom Exchange again as 8th graders. As for the adolescent girls I mentored, I plan to start a Bible based group that deals with rejection, forgiveness, love, and sex. The most important thing I have learned in working with the girls is that many of them are willing to accept the wholeness and love that only God gives.
As for space to operate Wisdom Exchange, I may use a café that I may open. I received a letter from a woman who I met during my mission trip in London. Her friend, who owns a well-established (and beautiful) tea house in South Carolina, is willing to train me so that I may open and operate a similar establishment. I plan to meet with Mr. Landeros, the owner of the abandoned ice cream shop across from a public housing complex, to discuss opening a tea house of sorts. Also, a friend of mine, who earned a bachelors degree in restaurant management, told me she is willing to help me. If this café becomes a reality, it could provide funding for girls’ and boys’ programs for years to come. As for now, the church I attend is allowing me to use its office as my office.
Missionary, business manager, program director, I am not worried about my career; I have faith the Lord will be by my side, regardless of my profession. I may suffer greatly on this earth but I know there will be a day when “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Revelation 21:4). I can only imagine how beautiful it will be to have all of God’s children at His feet worshipping Him. How wonderful it will be to be in His courts forever! These past months I have fallen deeper in love with God, seeing Him comfort the abused, like Tina, bring hope to the downtrodden, like Andres, and offer eternal life to all who accept him. What an awesome, loving, merciful, gracious God!
God loves us and does not want any of us to perish. He wants the best for us. He loves us so much; He wants to give us true joy and peace through His unfailing love. He demonstrated this love in coming down to earth, dying for us, and descending into hell so that we would not have to. It seemed unnecessary to me to accept Christ until I realized I could go to hell. (Ever since I accepted Him, much to my surprise, my life has changed for the better.) A friend of mine wisely said, “It’s funny how we stop doing something only when we see a negative consequence.” That is what hell can be seen as: something to get people to do what is better for them anyway. I encourage you to stop and think about what you would say if you died right now and God asked you, “Why should I let you into heaven?” “I was good” won't be enough. Not one of us is good enough. Only one is good enough: Jesus. He already took the punishment for our sin. “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him” (John 3:36). God loves you and wants to be with you always. If you want to start a relationship with God you can say something like this:
God, I am sorry for trying to live without you. Please forgive me for my sins. I believe Jesus died to pay for my sins. I invite Him into my heart. Please help me turn from my sins, fill me, and guide me from now on. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
If you meant this prayer with your heart, congratulations! You are at the beginning of a wonderful journey! You can go to the website below, slide 11-15, for information on what to do next.
If you wonder why we need Christ, please check out this website: http://www.greatcom.org/laws/english/flash/ If you ask God to show Himself to you, He will, just be open to Him; when you seek Him with all your heart you will find Him.
Wisdom Exchange 2006 ended nicely. A bus full of excited girls went to the science museum in San Diego. The girls had fun and learned about physics, noise vibrations, reflections, etc. The girls also enjoyed executing their community service projects. All the girls made paintings and each group took them somewhere: a homeless shelter, battered women’s shelter, nursing home, and a rehabilitation hospital. During their visits many of the girls went up to a guest, had a short conversation and gave her/him the painting she had made. Some groups took additional things such as Easter baskets and plants.
During the last week as director of Wisdom Exchange 2006, I received a letter of vacancy from the Housing Authority of the City of Yuma. I had been told that I would more than likely be able to extend my contract to use the community center and office space, so I was disappointed to receive this letter. But as the saying goes: God closes some doors, but opens others. I approached the owner of an abandoned ice cream shop across the street from a public housing complex and told him, “I want to open a café/homework help center to show people Jesus’ love.” He called me a few days after our meeting and said, “The building is yours, rent free.” A similar blessing is that the owner of my apartment is only charging me utilities, because he said he liked the work I do. With the money saved in not having to pay rent and some money I had saved I was able to pay for a trip to Europe, similar to one I had wanted to take the year before.
At the end of Wisdom Exchange, I asked all of the participants to fill out evaluations. Mentors said they learned several skills, including being a leader, benefited from having women from the community speak with them, and were glad they had given their time and been mentors. Many of the girls in middle school grasped the skills taught very well, while several of the girls in elementary school did not seem to grasp many of skills very well or were not able to convey it in the evaluations. Because I did not require the girls to write their name on the evaluations I was not able to establish a correlation between skills grasped and attendance, something I will change in the future. All in all, the program was a success. The mission statement (to provide women and girls with opportunities to share the knowledge, experiences, and lessons learned from women in the community and throughout the world) was accomplished. For future work with children I will emphasize using proper discipline and teaching at age appropriate levels, especially regarding attention spans.
I am thankful for all that was learned by the participants and myself and especially thankful and touched by comments left by my middle school mentees, like the following: “She made me feel like I was special.” “You’d make a great mother.” This is the comment that means the most to me: “When I first met you, I thought I wouldn’t like you, but you still tried and now I can honestly say you are a true and wonderful friend. (heart, cross) God loves you. Tina” This is the young lady I mentioned in my first report, whose father had raped her; she became a Christian and stopped cutting herself, shortly after I reassured her that her father was twisted, informed her that Jesus understood how she felt because He too was abandoned by those He loved, and God her Father in heaven loved her. How wonderful that God was able to shine His love through me!
As I embarked on my trip to Europe my main goal was to share Jesus’ love and goodness, and our need for Him with others. I never could have planned what occurred during the following two months in Europe. One of the highlights of my trip occurred in Rome. I met a man named Andres. Andres told me about his children in Milan, his divorce, and his job. I told him God had great plans for his life. He said, “I’ve read the Bible.” I responded, “It is one thing to read it, another to believe it, and trust God.” I shared with Andres what I wrote about in my first report to you: how Jesus had helped me forgive and love people that I did not think I could love or forgive. I told him how following Jesus and really treating the Bible as Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth (B.I.B.L.E.), reading a portion of it everyday and taking it into context, has changed the way I see things and live. I told him the most important thing I ever did was inviting Jesus into my heart; He has truly helped me understand what life is about: loving Him and loving others. We talked from midnight until two a.m. When we parted he said, “I feel like a little boy who has just opened a new gift.” If my trip would have ended there, I would have been content.
The biggest highlight of my trip occurred while I was in London on a mission trip. Most of my days were busy: picking up trash, going door to door inviting people to a fun day for kids, visiting the elderly. However, it was on a quiet morning walk, when something truly wonderful occurred: I met Mick, a man willing to change. Mick realized that there would be judgment. We are made in God's image; we want the bad guys to get punished and the good guys to get a reward. God will punish, but only those whose sins are still upon them, whose sins have not been paid for. Mick realized he had sinned, broken at least one of The Ten Commandments; all humans have, except for Jesus: “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21). Mick believed Jesus paid for his sins on the cross, and all he needed to do was repent and believe in Him. Mick asked God to forgive him of his sins, asked God to help him turn from sin, and accepted Christ into his heart. How awesome to be used by God to bring one more soul into His kingdom!
I wish I could say something similar occurred while in Spain or while in the East Coast. All the people I met with were good: they seemed happy, had well paying jobs, nice homes, and almost all of them were in good physical health. Unfortunately, as the saying goes, what is good is often the enemy of what is best. Only Christ can give the best! We are satisfied with the “good”. Ironically, sometimes the “good” is not even that good. As I talked with many of my friends and family members, I saw sadness, unforgiveness, and bitterness. A few of them were also in physical pain. It was difficult for me to see them suffer. The emotional pain was especially hard to witness, because it could have been prevented and could be resolved with God’s help. I agree with C.S. Lewis in his book The Problem of Pain, experiencing pain can help those effected stop leaning on their understanding and come to trust God.
I experienced pain as soon as I returned home. I was telling my parents about my trip and my mom said, “You and talking to people about Jesus.” She has a negative attitude toward some of the things I believe; I think it is because both her mom and grandma were Catholic and she was raised to think differently. I tell my mom, “The most important thing is to love God above all things.” God knows our heart. He promises that if you seek Him with all your heart you will find Him (Jeremiah 29:13). I saw the reality of this promise in London; a Muslim woman had a vision of Christ and became a Christian afterwards. I drew closer to God because of my mom’s comment, praying for her more and more specifically.
A year ago, I was planning to stay in the Yuma community for a few years establishing and directing Wisdom Exchange. Now, I do not know where I will be in a year. I am currently praying about becoming an overseas missionary next fall. Regardless of what happens in the years to come, working with the girls this past year was an invaluable experience, through which God allowed me to touch lives, showed me needs to address this year, and taught me ways to address certain needs for the rest of my life.
I am grateful for all those who were involved in my receiving the Richardson Fellowship: the Richardson family, my recommendation letter writers, judges, and everyone at the Harvard College Fellowships Office. I am thankful for Lindsay Hyde, Strong Women, Strong Girls founder, for allowing me to use her program model and curriculum. I am especially thankful for Michelle Kang, my house tutor, friend, and sister in Christ; for helping me through the application process, for encouraging me, and for believing in me, even when I did not. Thank you all; the Richardson Fellowship enabled me to help girls in my community and funded the best year of my life. A special thank you to: all my mentors for your dedication, my sister for her thorough editing, the Housing Authority of the City of Yuma for the use of their space, Ariel Harms and Lindsay Hyde for helping me get started, and all the women who gave of their time. Wisdom Exchange existed because you gave.
I have decided to modify the Wisdom Exchange program to be 10th and 11th grade girls mentoring 8th grade girls with an adult woman in each group. I recognized girls in these age groups face many challenges and need all the skill training and encouragement they can get. One of the girls in one of my mentoring groups, an 8th grader, told me that her boyfriend wanted to have sex with her and that she did not know what to do. Just having the girls make a list of pros and cons about life-altering decisions, like having sex, can help them see what is at stake and prevent them from making harmful choices. There will be seminars for the mentors on the college application process, writing essays, and budgeting. Besides teach skills and provide support, this program will foster friendships that will allow the 8th graders to have the 10th and 11th graders as "big sisters" when they begin high school. I also recognized the importance of having other adult women run the groups, and interact with and get to know the participants during weekly meetings and outings. This will allow all of the participants to have several women they can trust and reach out to for years to come. God willing, this program will be implemented in six middle schools by January and continue for years to come.
I plan to continue pursuing relationships with as many of the girls who participated in Wisdom Exchange last year as possible. So far, their response has been very good. During my travels, I sent them post cards, and upon my return, when I saw them, they told me they were happy to have received them. Last week I hosted an ice cream/movie night for the mentors to catch up with me and one another; it was a blast. I have been spending quite a bit of time with many of the 3rd -5th grade girls who live in public housing in Arizona. I plan on substitute teaching three days a week starting at the end of November at the school in California that many of the other girls attend; I look forward to seeing many, hopefully all, of them participate in the Wisdom Exchange again as 8th graders. As for the adolescent girls I mentored, I plan to start a Bible based group that deals with rejection, forgiveness, love, and sex. The most important thing I have learned in working with the girls is that many of them are willing to accept the wholeness and love that only God gives.
As for space to operate Wisdom Exchange, I may use a café that I may open. I received a letter from a woman who I met during my mission trip in London. Her friend, who owns a well-established (and beautiful) tea house in South Carolina, is willing to train me so that I may open and operate a similar establishment. I plan to meet with Mr. Landeros, the owner of the abandoned ice cream shop across from a public housing complex, to discuss opening a tea house of sorts. Also, a friend of mine, who earned a bachelors degree in restaurant management, told me she is willing to help me. If this café becomes a reality, it could provide funding for girls’ and boys’ programs for years to come. As for now, the church I attend is allowing me to use its office as my office.
Missionary, business manager, program director, I am not worried about my career; I have faith the Lord will be by my side, regardless of my profession. I may suffer greatly on this earth but I know there will be a day when “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Revelation 21:4). I can only imagine how beautiful it will be to have all of God’s children at His feet worshipping Him. How wonderful it will be to be in His courts forever! These past months I have fallen deeper in love with God, seeing Him comfort the abused, like Tina, bring hope to the downtrodden, like Andres, and offer eternal life to all who accept him. What an awesome, loving, merciful, gracious God!
God loves us and does not want any of us to perish. He wants the best for us. He loves us so much; He wants to give us true joy and peace through His unfailing love. He demonstrated this love in coming down to earth, dying for us, and descending into hell so that we would not have to. It seemed unnecessary to me to accept Christ until I realized I could go to hell. (Ever since I accepted Him, much to my surprise, my life has changed for the better.) A friend of mine wisely said, “It’s funny how we stop doing something only when we see a negative consequence.” That is what hell can be seen as: something to get people to do what is better for them anyway. I encourage you to stop and think about what you would say if you died right now and God asked you, “Why should I let you into heaven?” “I was good” won't be enough. Not one of us is good enough. Only one is good enough: Jesus. He already took the punishment for our sin. “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him” (John 3:36). God loves you and wants to be with you always. If you want to start a relationship with God you can say something like this:
God, I am sorry for trying to live without you. Please forgive me for my sins. I believe Jesus died to pay for my sins. I invite Him into my heart. Please help me turn from my sins, fill me, and guide me from now on. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
If you meant this prayer with your heart, congratulations! You are at the beginning of a wonderful journey! You can go to the website below, slide 11-15, for information on what to do next.
If you wonder why we need Christ, please check out this website: http://www.greatcom.org/laws/english/flash/ If you ask God to show Himself to you, He will, just be open to Him; when you seek Him with all your heart you will find Him.
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